What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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bangers and mash?

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

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I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

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What are blacks scared of? The kkk

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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