What did the homeless man say to the rich man? Can i have some food?

Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

What happens if Chuck Norris meets a Transformer? Nothing. They would converse, then go their separate ways. Or Chuck would get killed. Horribly.

Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

Pineapple.

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

a man walked into a bar....

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

why are balck people black because they are

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...