Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

An elderly man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Dad!" The old man replies, "Hi son. I'll have a Bud Light." The bartender serves his dad a Bud Light and says, "I'm thinking about going back to school to become a doctor." The old man says, "I'm an alcoholic." The bartender replies, "Great, another Bud Light coming up!"

roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

haha look at that guys shirt! what's wrong with it? i don't know.. nothing i guess

Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

So a horse walks into a barn.

A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

White men's rights

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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