Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

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Diarrhea

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? You did?! Oh . . .

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Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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Your mom is so old she died

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a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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