Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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Mitt Romney is in the mormon mafia has magic underpants and invented Obama Care but he still lost to a Black guy Who is a fine president.

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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Your mom

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What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

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Why is three afraid of four? Because four ate five.

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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