What is worse than 3 lesbians in a telephone booth? 6 squirrels donkey punching your urethra.

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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Knock Knock, Ow my face

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a stupid chicken wandering around.

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a woman starring at him, she seems attractive... he walks up to her and realizes that sheis quite mediocre if not even ugly. He proceeds to say "You'll do"

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why was the boy crying he had cancer

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roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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What if the rest of you value something wrong?

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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