A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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If your Uncle Jack helped you off an elephant, would you help your Uncle jackoff an elephant? Probably not because it would take more than 3 hands to jack off an elephant P.S. Your Uncle Jack only has 1 hand. Your uncle was on a swing and a clown cut off his hand with an ax

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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Water? I hardly know her.

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what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

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Q: Why did the white man die? A: because he had cancer

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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