Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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A sixty Year old man walks into a bank to rob it. He tells the bank teller, "Take the money and put it into a bag!" The teller told him, "Sir I don't have a bag." So the old man turns around and walks out.

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

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A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

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What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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My name is Jeff

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops