What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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I was gonna make a joke about a my dick... Racecar

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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A boy askes santa for a baby brother. Santa says give me your mom.

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my mind's eye?

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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What do you get when you cross a confused man and an anti-social woman? I don't know, go away.

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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when a friend comes over and says: hey, do you have a bathroom??? NO!!! I shit in my yard!!!!!

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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Hi

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how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops