Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

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The queen having a shit

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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Communism hehe xd

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i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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epic win?

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

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A christian and an atheist are in a bar. The christian says "if you don't accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior you will go to hell." The atheist replies "No I won't."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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