Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

4 hours later.

fridge

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

So an irish man walks into a bar, 10 seconds later he is dead. What happened was there was a sharp piece of metal on the bar so is cut his throat and he bleed to death.

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

Why dd the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She lost her arms to cancer.

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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