Why was the baby crying? Because it was just born and usually a baby cries when its born, if it dosent it usually means something is wrong, so the mother was happy to hear her baby cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him. A horse walks into a bar Barman says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My mum died this morning".

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How to find if your overweight? Ask your friend to make a big clay volcano, out of baking soda and vinegar. While its erupting if you're too busy eatin five course dinner. FAT

thumb_up thumb_down -17

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

men

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are smiling, violets are trying to kill me. DId I mention I'm a paranoid schizophrenic?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a Pokemon without a trainer? A wild pokemon.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops