What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Two hippos are in a lake with water up to their eyes. One of them then says, "i keep thinking it's tueday"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: why did everyone on the ship drown? A: Because the ship sunk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Dance is a sport

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops