What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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