Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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