What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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