What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

Justin Bieber

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

What's better than a stick? A stone

What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

Knock knock Fuck off!

What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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