My jeans

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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David Cameron

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Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS JOKE??? A: Another joke you didn't think was funny... REFRIGERATOR!! O.k. Now it's funny!

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley, I live next door.

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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