What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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why did the circus boy not do his homework? because he was in a coma.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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