What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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