Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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A cat playing laser tag.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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A man penetrates another man.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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