What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

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What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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^ That's not even funny ^

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

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Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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