In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops