Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Why do we oftenly see african cry for nothing? Because this is the only way they get water.

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

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Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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