what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

Jesus Christ

What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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