What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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