Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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civil rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Columbus Day... A day to remember the anniversary of Columbus enslaving America.

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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