How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

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some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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