What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

You know what's cool? Yep.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...