Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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