Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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kkkk

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Gay rights.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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