Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

What does? 42

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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