Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

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why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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