How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

What's better than a stick? A stone

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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