Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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