Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

The New York Giants

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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