What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Yes

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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