Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

^ That's not even funny ^

Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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