Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +29

joe galasso from plainview ny

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +27

noah is a scrub jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

thumb_up thumb_down +27

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +25

But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops