Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Knock knock. Get out!!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

What happens when a Jew, a black man, and a Latino walk into the bar? The potential for racial humor.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

What rhymes with milk...milf

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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