What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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