Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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