How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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