Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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