Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

have safe sex

Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

Fox News

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

What is worse than torture? Not much.

A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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