A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops