Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

Top 10 Signs You Might Be Lonely and in Need of a Friend 10. Your closest friend has a skull tattooed on his knuckles and goes by the nickname bruiser. 9. You are becoming a little too fond of chess and pocket protectors. 8. You parents complain that your friends are a "Pack of wild chickens"-and it's not a figure of speech. 7. You follow your mailman around in hopes of a good conversation. 6. A cop pulls you over for speeding, and you add him to your Chistmas card list. 5. Your equation for a snappy party = TV remote + bean dip. 4. You forward e-mail jokes to yourself regularly. 3. You six best friends are Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Rachel. 2. You've named all of your roaches. 1. Phone solicitors hang up on you!

so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

Wats blue and always in the sky?? Cheese! Except cheese is not blue and it is not always in the sky... By Rachael Mcmullan

In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...