whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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Donald Trump

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops