What did the American man say to his brother right before his brother's wedding? You should not get married because most likely your marriage will end in a horrible divorice, which will ruin the rest of your pathetic life.

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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bite me

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Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

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Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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