How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

So a bar walks into a man...

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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