There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

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PICKLES

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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