A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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