So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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asdasdasdasd

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops